Advices

Strap-ons for folks with disabilities

Did you know that there is more than one kind of harnesses? We mostly see “pelvic harnesses” in sex shops. Those are the harnesses that you attach around your pelvic area to penetrate a partner with a sex toy. Not everyone can or wants to use a harness attached to their pelvic areas. You can use thighs harnesses, boot harnesses, face harnesses, etc.

Sadly, most sex shops focus only on pelvic harnesses and sell other kinds of harnesses in the kink section. This, for sure makes it harder for folks with disabilities to access usable harnesses.  It also deeply fetishizes disable bodies, by associating them with kinks or fetishes.

This article was written in collaboration with Chronic Sex  and Noé . They deeply helped me by sharing their favorites toys and how they can be used in so many ways. 

The first harnesses we will be chatting about are underwear harnesses. Those harnesses go around the pelvic area but they are more comfortable than the traditional strap harness. They can be more comfortable than harnesses for people with hip/back chronic pain. They are also softer, which can be good for folks with hyper-sensibility. My two favorite brands are RodeoH and space parts hard wear . They both make underwear harnesses in many styles, brief, boxer brief, lingerie, etc. Rodeoh also has a sale page where they put discounted harnesses and dildos.

 

Underwear harnesses usually hide genitalia, which can be a cool thing for folks with genitalia dysphoria but it also means that your junk is harder to access. A cool trick for that is to use hand free vibrators when wearing a strap-on. It procures stimulation and you do not need to interact with your genitalia! Which reduce movements during masturbation or sexual encounters. You can either keep the remote in your hand to simulate yourself or give the remote to your partner(s) so they decide.

Here is a list of a couple of awesome hand-free vibrators. Please note that all of those toys are really expensive (Between 99$ and 200$)! Sadly, there is not a lot of hand free vibrators on the market which makes it harder to find cheaper ones. You can DM me for cheaper options.

The company We-vibe makes a bunch of hand-free vibrators, that stimulates pretty much everybody parts. They make butt plugs, cock rings, insertable toys that stimulated the clitoris or not,  etc. That is pretty awesome because hand-free vibrators companies usually focus on vaginal and clitoral stimulation!

The EVA II from Dame product is a recent sex toy concept that stimulates the clitoris without having to be inside of you. As someone that doesn’t like vaginal penetration, the EVA II sounds REALLY interesting. It looks like it would be an awesome toy to wear under a harness.

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For folks with penises, the Pulse by Hot octopus sounds really interesting. The pulse is a vibrator that uses oscillations to stimulate the penis, which means that you do not need to have an erection to use it. This allows the user to enjoy the sensation of being made hard, but on the other, it offers amazing possibilities for those who suffer from erectile dysfunction (ED). * From spectrum boutique.

There is two pulse, the duo and the single. The single is used for masturbation and the duo can be used for masturbation and couple play. The pulse duo as an integrated hand free vibrator where one partner can sit on the pulse while its used on the other partner’s penis and they can enjoy vibration that is controlled by a controller. For more explanation, you can go on Hot octopus website, but keep in mind that it is a heavily gendered website. 

The last product is the SOLA Sync by SOLA. It is a vibrating wand that you can control with a remote. It can be useful for more intense stimulation and because it is a wand, it can be easier to move around.

For other harnesses that you can wear around your pelvic areas, you can wear a harness that will give you anal stimulation. Those harnesses are usually used in kinky settings, but they do not need to be! It can be fun to have a butt plug strapped on you that you do not need to replace or move. There is also harnesses with penis extensions that help with penis owners who want to have an erection and who are feeling like they’re not able to perform due to erection or mobility issues.

Note that you also do not need to be on top to be dominant. For some folks, including me, it is easier to lay down and have your partner ride on top or you. Being physically on top can get really painful. Companies like Sportsheets make a bunch of straps to facilitate sex position, to hold your legs up while being penetrated, to have a better grip while doing doggy style, etc. 

For harnesses that straps on other parts of the body, there is a bunch. They can be fun because you can try other position and you do not necessarily need to thrust your hips (which not everyone is able to do).

Thighs strap-ons are really cool. They strap on your thigh and someone can sit on you and ride your thighs. They are also cheaper (around 30$) then pelvic harnesses. They are basically a strap with a c-ring for a dildo, so you can pretty much use them on any parts of the body. Many folks use them on feet or boots as well.

https://www.sportsheets.com/products/thigh-strap-on

https://thepleasurechest.com/buckling-thigh-harness.html

https://spectrumboutique.com/product/stockroom-leather-thigh-harness/

https://thepleasurechest.com/buckling-thigh-harness.html?aff=14

You can also get chin harnesses, which are awesome for oral sex. With them, you can penetrate and give oral sex to your partner at the same time.

https://thepleasurechest.com/lickety-split-chin-harness.html

https://www.amazon.com/CalExotics-Original-Accommodator-Latex-Dong/dp/B002JINP1C

In conclusion, there is a bunch of amazing strap-ons and harnesses out there and they can be used on so many parts of our bodies! What’s written on the box doesn’t really matter, what’s important is, if a toy can make you feel good use it in any way you want!

 

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